The Perspective – Fantasy Football – Week 2 Recap and basic lampooning of teams and players
CARNAGE. That is the best word I can think of to summarize the first two weeks of the season.
The list of injuries grows weekly, but the fish on this list keep getting bigger!
… Just to name a few…
Which leads me to the focus of this weeks recap. Position players. WR. RB. I thought all along, this league was simply about Quarterbacks ONLY. The other players were nice, but insignificant. Like hanging dice from the rearview mirror of your Lambo. Boy was I wrong, and D-Long and his Majestic Peacocks were more then merciful in doling out this knowledge.
Recapping the matchups from the highest scoring team/matchup down the list, we first come to the aforementioned Peacocks.
Fly, peacock, Fly!
The Majestic Peacocks – 219 Where my Blitzes at? – 153
Even with another solid showing from Blitzes, garnering 153 points. This week the P-cocks were the Tractor Trailer and the Blitzes were the armadillo. Vincent “Vega” Jackson and Fitzy were off the chain scoring almost as many points as the QB’s, whereas the flipside of that equation for the Blitzes was watching Mario Manningham drop every other pass thrown his way. Why did I draft a black guy named Mario??? As for D-Long and his P-cocks. His Beef strong. 2-0 and marching towards his 3rd win. The Blitzes are regrouping after a minor setback and hoping that Romo takes his multivitamin and puts some duct tape on his lung hole and plays on Monday night, because no one, and I mean, NO ONE, wants to see Matt Cassel starting.
WHATCHOO TALKIN BOUT HILLIS – 167 Team WTF!!! – 66
Let’s get a little perspective here. Was this an epic beatdown. Yes, it was. Was this possibly one of the worst performances by a fantasy team in the history of this league. Indeed, this was nearly the worst if not the worst of all time! Finally, is there hope for Team WTF!!?? Yep, there is hope. And prayer. And Holistic Medicine and JuJu Beads and rabbits feet and psychic palm readers and…I digress. My point is simply this, had WTF started a few other players in place of some underachievers this week, he could have scored approximately 60+ more points and this would have been a respectable loss instead of the “We’ve Got A Bleedaaah!” scene that occurred. “Franks and Beans!” (Fast forward to :55 seconds)
HILLIS was balanced across the board, with almost every player (Bench included) scoring in double digits. 1-1 after a slow start, Hillis has the chance to put a nice stretch together, whereas WTF!! needs to figure out WTF they’re gonna do to right the ship.
PREEZEE DUZIT – 148 ZALLA’S BALLA’s – 147.
Ooooooooooohhhhhhhh! Boom goes the dynamite. I don’t think we will have another come from behind 1 point win for the rest of the season. This was amazing! PD sat Cam Newton and yet every other player he sat was correct! Sometimes things just happen, regardless of the choices made, players started, etc… Both teams will be ok moving forward and I feel ZB’s will recover just fine as they have scored a good amount of points as a team. Sometimes, the other team just scores more… (See Majestic Peacocks for reference!!)
We like to imagine PD’s sitting on the couch, realizing that a win was possible and the following happening…
PD’s face a 2-0 team that I have no idea how they are 2-0. While ZB’s face Blitzes in what should be a close contest!
NOTLOOSINGTOOMYWIFETHISTIME – 131 A RIVERS Runs through it – 123
Look, after last week, I was thinking we give Jared a 15 point head start each week, in lieu of being the worst team last season, having to watch Notre Dame get manhandled at home against USF, live, during the draft, but then Notre Dame beat Michigan State and my empathy went out the window. This was as winnable a matchup as RIVERS could have asked for. Alas, Kenny Britt was riding the pine, again… Arian Foster is just killing RIVERS while making Ben Tate relevant… No one else, save for the QB’s is showing much sign of life. This could get ugly, long term. WifeLooser just lost Jamaal Charles to a season ending ACL injury, but they have a capable replacement, plus JC hadn’t done anything this season anyhow and WifeLooser is 2-0…Scratching my head…